All that you can't leave behind.

It's been four months since the girl has been truly happy, it's been four months that the girl has been learning the truth. walls have ears right? is this how she learned the truth? or maybe her friends told her things. there are things in life that you are told that completely break your heart but you have to act like you don't care. things that you wish you never knew but then again glad that you know. things that make you act a certain way.. feel a certain way. resentment, fear, disbelief, sadness maybe? It's two am in the morning, i am typing in the darkness the little light from my computer aids my vision. i look up and i see pictures on my wall. a particular one catches my attention. memories flood back in, they are following me like a shadow. what if? what if four months ago the girl had been true to herself? what if the girl had gotten what  she wanted? would she be happier now? or would she end up just like everyone else who thought they had  gotten what they wanted? would she regret things? is she regretting things? does she wish she had said something? doesn't she think she should say something? is she brave enough? would it be worth it in the end for her? will it bring about happiness for her? satisfaction maybe? will the sleepless nights go away? tears dry up? will it be the last time she has to fake a smile? who knows? she doesn't that's for sure. she wishes she did. she is not brave enough yet. she has had the chances to prove she was but they all ended up in a total fiasco. someday she will be brave enough. when she is she will get what she wants. but then again if she know that a simple act of bravery will solve everything then why doesn't she take the step? someday .. maybe. who knows?